How “Single” Should Look Like

“If you were saved from a relationshit, then you should learn to appreciate it.”

Not that I am being very cynical about your reasons of being single, but at some point, there was a reason why you are single. Maybe for days, months and for some – years.

When you are in a middle of a broken heart, whether it’s a good break up or not, you’d (at some point) cry for awhile, would think what went wrong and would utter prayers such as “Why?”.

Break up is one of the most tear jerking moments of your life, thinking it has no end. That the pain inside is unlimited, that you won’t know where to start – a life that might have died, even while still in the relationship.

For me, though being in a relationship is good and satisfying, it is during my single hood that I became a better person. The time when I explore the side of me, I never knew and the moment I get to experience a life, I know, that will change and be different, once I’d settle into a relationship.

Single life is also a gift. A gift that was wrapped in a mirror – it reflects what’s in its environment – adapting what surrounds it and you have to look at it and appreciate your own reflection first, before you get to open and appreciate what’s within.

Some people dreaded this gift because it can cause some hurt in their eyes when they look at it because sometimes, it reflects the sunlight.

Some wouldn’t like this gift because they don’t like what they see when they look at it – their own reflection.

There is something weird in this gift because of how it looks like. When it’s in a dark room, it’ll also look dark to the point of not even noticing it. It sort of camouflages and adapts to it’s environment.

On the other hand, when surrounded by a sunny garden, flowers and beautiful things, it does shows that lively spirit too. When you put your single hood gift in an energy of positivity, that is what you’d also gain from it. If you dwell on things otherwise, you’d also get that negative vibes.

Being single should be experienced in a passionate manner too. I never thought one can be passionate with life without their other half. I can’t help but remember a Youtube video entitled, “When the missing piece, meets the big, O”.

 You have to know how to roll on your own and be that “complete” being, to be able to appreciate this gift.

But, the question here is, how?

By choosing yourself, over and over again. 

When you are single, you never stop dating, going to places and meet new people. And when you stumble upon someone that can guarantee confusion and complications in the long run, learn to choose your own happiness over the idea of just being in a relationship, just to satisfy your longing to having a partner – even if it’s less than what you’ve dreamed about. The “good” will always be the “best”‘s rival in your life.

Being single entitles you to be strong, amidst those temptations and you should choose yourself (and also your future) again and again. A future that you have embedded in your mind. A standard that you’ve settled for yourself.

Waiting for the right time is as crucial too as accepting this gift because patience is something that is incorporated in this gift.

People would sometimes forget to savor the moment and would jump into another relationship without really appreciating and enjoying this gift of single hood.

I’m not saying that someone should wait for a lifetime, like the story of Love Rosie by Cecelia Ahern type of waiting but just enough when you know and have uttered, “Yes, this is what I want and I am choosing this life.”

At times it can be a detour, that entails getting lost along the way. Uncertainty can also blur your mind into something you thought was nice, but wasn’t. Sometimes, you can be blinded – Salt looks a lot like sugar too and not all glittery are gold.

Being single must be perceived as a gift and not as a curse. Get to learn from it, savor every minute of it and become that one whole piece of gold that will be sought after by a lot of people. Not because of your glitter but because of your soul and who you really are as a person. This is the time of your life when you will be in connection with your inner self and not all people were given this chance of a lifetime.

An Open Letter to Critics

Go. Criticize me all you want.
Throw stones at me all you like.
I’d rather be wrong and find out I am, rather than believing that I am living a lie – a world of make-believe, where everything seems to be perfect.

Go and find fault in me because that is the only way I know that can help me improve.
Go. Look at me like I am the most stupid person in this world;
Blame me for all the things they did wrong because that is the only way I can protect them from incompetence and lack of empathy.

Go. Because that is what we are good at – pointing fingers.
Go and let me learn from every pitfall I’d find myself fallen into.
Find me at fault to every negligence, when it was the lack of strategy that’s causing every missed opportunity.
Go and give me all the knock-outs now.

Sometimes, we need to learn the hard way and only the strong and the mighty can accept that truth.

“Some people will always throw stones in your path. It depends on you what you make with them, Wall or Bridge? Remember you are the architect of your life.” – Anonymous

You can blame me all you want but you will never see me cry.
I will never apologize because I’ve poured my heart and soul to everything that I do.
If that is not enough for you, you have two choices:
Keep me and keep up with me, until I finally learned from my mistakes or
Let me go.
Either way, it’ll never be my loss, because I am used to starting from scratch and bouncing back to life over and over again.

To those who will and who had criticized me, thank you because
You’ve made me stronger by breaking my heart.

Is Duterte Our Generation’s Version of Heneral Luna?

It has been weeks since I’ve been attempting to write a review about this film, Heneral Luna however, one writer from Rappler sums up the exact feelings I have had about this film.

We shared the same sentiments about the said movie especially when it was revealed that it’ll be the Philippines’ entry in one of the most sought after international award-giving body for movies; It’s both shame and pride that sounds like, “Why are we gonna show the whole world our dirty laundry? Will it do any good for us? Will it be our pride or would it be humiliating?”. You’d be torn between applauding and hibernating.

But then, I thought, so what now? We should be “awaken” by this film, but the question there is, “Are we”?

Yes, at the moment, it has gained its 180M mark and Gregorio Del Pilar’s time to shine is in the pipe line. But, What now?

Does that stop on us, posting our nationalistic self in all our social media account? Is this all about making a high caliber movie or is there something more to this? It may just be a fiction movie that was based from facts, but what if, there is a hidden message within, that wants us to realize? What if, this movie wants us to be fully aware of what went wrong and to re-live that moment, when one “Heneral Luna” was there to fight for us?

What if, this movie would want us, the new Filipino generation to change what was written in the history books, so as not to say, “History repeats itself?”. Yes, Filipinos of yesterday, instead of fighting with him, they killed him, stabbed him to death and fired gun on him. What if, right at this moment, we were given a chance to change what had happened before and create a much better future ahead of us?

What if, this generation’s Heneral Luna is disguising to be a Davaoeño Mayor who is known with the same courage, heart and mind as Antonio Luna? Are you gonna give this country a chance?

Do you think, Mayor Rodrigo Duterte from Davao qualifies to be our new generation’s Heneral Luna? But, this time, are we gonna kill him and our hopes, just like what we did before?

What’s your thoughts? Think about it.

I’ve Waited Long For This

Have you ever prayed for something before and it started to materialize one by one?
That it was just a thought 4 years ago and has now become a reality?

“Be careful what you wish for ‘coz you might just get it”

Yes, you have to be careful with what you wish for because we’d never know if we can get it or not. But what would you feel if it wasn’t the way you thought it was?

It’s presented with a lot of problems.
Unstable.
Stressful.
Unhappy.

and everything you thought was just assumptions?

How would you react to it?

Absurd isn’t?

Would you still like to stay for it? or would you be fixing the problem that you get along the way?

Imagine yourself wishing and longing for love. You thought it was all roses; that thorns were out of the picture. But when you finally knew what love is, it was a vein of thorns that has a rose on it.

But remember, it was still the place that you once prayed for.

Would you still fight for it?

Those thorns that will prick you along the way were the hindrances and challenges that will let you question your dream. If you really want it, you will accept every flaw that it has shown you. Love (and life) has always been like that. It will never give you a bed roses without thorns on it. Life will always find reason to challenge you and so with your dreams. If you really want it, no matter what it takes, you will fight for it. it’s life way of asking you,

How much do you really want to have it?
Are you going to accept everything about it even the inconveniences it’ll give you?
Will you continue to love it even though you’ve seen and felt its flaws?

Life has its own way of challenging you. the question is, “Are you willing to accept the challenges it beholds, for you to get what you have always dreamed of?”

Be the Problem Solver: One Problem At A Time

Our world has never been perfect. We always see ourselves in the middle of a battle – whether it be with ourselves or with other people. Unfortunately, this world never ran out of problems – at home, at work, with friends, with loved ones, with acquaintances and with every person we’d meet along the way. But hey, there’s good news..

man

Photo grabbed from:
The Soul Purpose Project

Start becoming a problem solver: One problem at a time.
How do you become a problem solver?
Start from your own self. Resolve inner conflict with yourself. Learn to forgive oneself on things you didn’t do and the bad things you’ve committed. Start looking at the mirror and admire the person you are seeing. Resolve the things you hate about yourself. Work on it.
Laziness? Get up and just put yourself out there.
Procrastinating? Start getting things done.
After yourself, start resolving your conflict at home – with your wife, partner, mother, parents, sibling, then with your co workers, neighbors, community and so on.
Start with baby steps.
Start with small goals and every day, create new ones.
A compilation of small acts of kindness will overwhelm the world.

It’s the small things that matters.
A single act of kindness is better than the grandest intention.

Start small and end big. You’ll never know how many problems will you solve if you won’t try something you have never encountered.

Problems will always be part of life – learn to deal with it; otherwise, you’ll just end up wishing and hoping you did.