I had to deep breathe and search inside my head for something exciting to write about. It was dull. Black and white. Nothing to say, nothing to preach.
After work, for the last three months I think, I’d find myself staring blankly with nothing in mind. Not the usual overthinking me. It’s as if, I just want to shut down and just be free from anything. Feel myself and my heart beat.
What I’d search in youtube? Not the Ted talk I used to, but some operating room surgery – pimple popping videos or anything that doesn’t require thinking – just watching.
I don’t know if this is healthy or not but for sometime, I’m nothing but my work and my advocacy to make my line of business successful. It has been my life. Even my dreams would be composed of my work stuff ; and sadly, I never got annoyed with it.
Maybe, I’ve placed my heart and soul into it, thinking it was my own company that I run. Sometimes, I open my office’ door and think, I will have a company like this. (Just weird things I’ve thought about. Something random).
My passion right now, is not only to write and read, just like before. Passion do also evolve. (Good to know!) Just like self discovery and Learning. It never ceases. It changes, time after time and you must find yourself up to date all the time. My passion right now, is facing challenges with dignity. Sometimes, I think I’m unstoppable. Thank you, to all the struggles I have faced these days. I am maturing professionally and I like it. Maybe, the more problems I get to encounter and resolve, the better I’d become in the future.
It’s still not making sense right now and I have multiple unanswered questions in my head too.
But what can I do? I submit to what my heart truly desires and leave it all up to the author of my life. What I can promise Him is, in everything that I do, I’d do out of love and with His guidance, I know I can conquer anything.
So help me, God.
This is my ephemeral outburst 02/16/2016 😊
The feelings ain’t apathy anymore. It’s the burning desire and belief, that we can make it through the rain. It’s as if, success is within our reach. 😱😊