Be Prepared for the Shit Sandwich

I’ve Waited Long for This

That was the article I wrote after getting what I dreamed of, 5 years ago – to become a trainer. It wasn’t an easy road to get through. Roadblocks, setbacks, hurdles, struggles and I must admit, I wasn’t prepared for the shit sandwich.

But first of all, what is a “Shit Sandwich”?

It was Elizabeth Gilbert who introduced that notion to me. Shit sandwich is the “shit” that comes along with your dream. It’s the struggles that you have to face and you should endure, for you to get into or stick with your dream. It’s the concept when someone tells you, “You can’t succeed!” because you are not enough. It’s the depression that you’d feel thereafter and these are the stormy days that you face just to become your dream.

If you are a singer, the shit sandwich that you should face is the booing of people while you perform and those people who’d belittle your talent, If you are a dancer, that is the crack in your bone that hinders you to perform well. For students, it’s the homework that you have to do and the projects that you have to finish. And for me, it’s the complexity of the whole dream of mine. Makes me think, “Do I really want this?”; something that I never saw coming.

As what I’ve read too, in one of John Maxwell’s book,

“The Punch that knocks you out is not necessarily the hardest one, but the one that you didn’t see coming.”

So, every struggle that you face, are there for a reason. To continuously ask you, “Do you really want this? if Yes, then, conquer me. You may quit anytime. Probably, this is not really your dream. Maybe this is a dream that was only imposed to you. A dream that you thought you wanted, but in reality, you don’t give a damn.

I’ve also found an article too, where one famous writer, the author of Harry Potter Series, THE J.K Rowling, posted her rejection letters to her fans to give them inspiration to dream big and never let this shit sandwich come their way. Who would have known that someone like her has been rejected when she was starting. If she gave up, we would never have known, who Harry Potter is.

So, before I’d end up this article, I will leave you with the question, what shit sandwich are you willing to take for you to fight for your dream? Somethings we need to ponder on.

Freedom Writers (Movie Suggestion)

Just like Miracle Worker, Freedom Writers is another inspiring story about a teacher.

“Teachers have infinite influence to the youth”

This movie is about the burning passion of a teacher, to teach kids in rehab. Those kids that were constantly been involved in brawls, drugs and addiction. Kids who were homeless, abused and those that were victims of child violence. These kids were basically, the problem of the society who never see the importance of studying because of how they were raised and the lack of guidance from their family.

They were judged because of their juvenile records in jail and had been exposed to the darker side of this world.

It’s a story about a teacher named, Ms. Erin Gruwell who believed in the abilities and talents of these kids despite their attitude towards her in the beginning.

A tear jerking story it is, because of its tough start.Her students initially do not respect her because they were wounded from the inside. She made them believe how great they are by listening to their stories and by genuinely caring for them. They have trusted her and opened up to her because of her sincerity towards them, that soon gained their respect.

It was also a difficult time for her when she was trying to get more resources for her students. Her advocacy wasn’t supported by her boss and the school management because of their skepticism towards the success of her goal for her students.

She was able to turn the table around both for her students and the school by giving them hope that people can change. She was able to teach these kids real life lessons that  has inspired them to become better individuals.

It was also an eye-opener on how a teacher should be. That their responsibility isn’t limited within the four corners of the classroom but also even outside of their school life – real life lessons that they can use even outside school.

They had been a family after that encounter and they were able to graduate high school (some of them graduated first in the family) because of Ms. G’s passionate gusto to teach them and help them. Another real life story which made it touch the hearts of its audience even more.

This movie made me learn that every person matters, every story counts. If we only have the guts to care about them, then we can turn the world around too.

Enjoy watching! 🙂

What is Mini Travelling?

Again, as I’ve mentioned a number of times in this blog, I’ve never been a travel buff but travelling in places I’ve never been, even if it’ll just be within my proximity, is my thing. Mini Travelling as I’d say.

What is Mini Travelling? Well, this is not something globally known or internationally used. It’s how I coined my personal small tours in cities nearby. Something that others might not even consider as “travelling”.

Travelling for me, in the past consists of an airfare, bus fare or any cruise along. It has to be extravagant for me to call it, as “travelling”. Thus, the term travelling had it’s limits in my head. Never have I thought that travelling can be of different perspective, too.

When I started blogging about restaurants in 2012, I didn’t consider it as travelling because most of the time, since I live near Taguig (before) and most of the food stop that I blog about are just within BGC (Bonifacio Global City) or Market! Market! area, I thought, it’s more of a food blogging thing. Yes, it is.. But thinking about how it has been, those are my “mini travels”.

What are my mini travel essentials?

Camera

Again, this has nothing to do with luxury camera, iPhones or you being a professional photographer. All you need is a camera phone that can capture those picturesque moments. A post in your social media account is optional. Well personally, my mini travels are more of an intimate thing I do with myself so, a post in the social media might be a no-no for me (sometimes though, I break that rule of mine). I’ll usually wait and post it in my blog when I got home. Makes me savor the moment.

Comfortable Travel Shoes

I’m a rubber shoes kind of girl. Sometimes, sneakers or ballet shoes, too. More than the style, it’s the comfort I’d go for. Boots can also be of a great alternative, like the ones made by Caterpillar. It’s known for durable work boots, Caterpillar is available online at ZALORA Philippines.

“Give a girl the right shoes, and she can conquer the world” – Bette Midler

Travel Bag

A body bag, shoulder bag or a back pack will do for me. As long as I have these inside: my wallet (of course with money and my cards), umbrella, toothbrush and tooth paste, wet wipes or tissue papers, cologne, house keys, notebook, pens and a good book.

My Valiant Self

I don’t have a car and I don’t know how to drive. Thus, I have to be courageous enough to ride a bus, ask strangers about stuff or even ride a taxi. It’s also a nightmare to commute, especially for areas that you are not familiar with. It takes a lot of strength to ask people some directions without looking so dumb, so you won’t be taken advantage of, especially for girl travelers.

My advice will still be: keep a safe travel. Just like travelling to other countries, safety is still the number one priority. You need to take care of yourself and at the same time, do not limit yourself to distant travelling (out of town or country). Try to see great places in your area and explore it. You’ll never know who you’ll bump into and friends that you may gain in the future, that may want to explore your city. Explore it first, so you have something to share, if they want to visit you.

Mini Travelling need not to be expensive too. (Since it’ll just be within your area, then a good amount of money is not a must). It’s more of the time, you give yourself. You can also bring your own book and travel inside your mind. Write and reflect about your life while you explore the place and just be it. Mini travel is also a good bonding time with your love ones. Look for activities that you can enjoy and don’t forget to take pictures. It’s the memories that you create that counts.

What are you waiting for? Search for those fun stuff to do within 10 miles from your place and for sure, you’ll find something worthwhile. 🙂

How “Single” Should Look Like

“If you were saved from a relationshit, then you should learn to appreciate it.”

Not that I am being very cynical about your reasons of being single, but at some point, there was a reason why you are single. Maybe for days, months and for some – years.

When you are in a middle of a broken heart, whether it’s a good break up or not, you’d (at some point) cry for awhile, would think what went wrong and would utter prayers such as “Why?”.

Break up is one of the most tear jerking moments of your life, thinking it has no end. That the pain inside is unlimited, that you won’t know where to start – a life that might have died, even while still in the relationship.

For me, though being in a relationship is good and satisfying, it is during my single hood that I became a better person. The time when I explore the side of me, I never knew and the moment I get to experience a life, I know, that will change and be different, once I’d settle into a relationship.

Single life is also a gift. A gift that was wrapped in a mirror – it reflects what’s in its environment – adapting what surrounds it and you have to look at it and appreciate your own reflection first, before you get to open and appreciate what’s within.

Some people dreaded this gift because it can cause some hurt in their eyes when they look at it because sometimes, it reflects the sunlight.

Some wouldn’t like this gift because they don’t like what they see when they look at it – their own reflection.

There is something weird in this gift because of how it looks like. When it’s in a dark room, it’ll also look dark to the point of not even noticing it. It sort of camouflages and adapts to it’s environment.

On the other hand, when surrounded by a sunny garden, flowers and beautiful things, it does shows that lively spirit too. When you put your single hood gift in an energy of positivity, that is what you’d also gain from it. If you dwell on things otherwise, you’d also get that negative vibes.

Being single should be experienced in a passionate manner too. I never thought one can be passionate with life without their other half. I can’t help but remember a Youtube video entitled, “When the missing piece, meets the big, O”.

 You have to know how to roll on your own and be that “complete” being, to be able to appreciate this gift.

But, the question here is, how?

By choosing yourself, over and over again. 

When you are single, you never stop dating, going to places and meet new people. And when you stumble upon someone that can guarantee confusion and complications in the long run, learn to choose your own happiness over the idea of just being in a relationship, just to satisfy your longing to having a partner – even if it’s less than what you’ve dreamed about. The “good” will always be the “best”‘s rival in your life.

Being single entitles you to be strong, amidst those temptations and you should choose yourself (and also your future) again and again. A future that you have embedded in your mind. A standard that you’ve settled for yourself.

Waiting for the right time is as crucial too as accepting this gift because patience is something that is incorporated in this gift.

People would sometimes forget to savor the moment and would jump into another relationship without really appreciating and enjoying this gift of single hood.

I’m not saying that someone should wait for a lifetime, like the story of Love Rosie by Cecelia Ahern type of waiting but just enough when you know and have uttered, “Yes, this is what I want and I am choosing this life.”

At times it can be a detour, that entails getting lost along the way. Uncertainty can also blur your mind into something you thought was nice, but wasn’t. Sometimes, you can be blinded – Salt looks a lot like sugar too and not all glittery are gold.

Being single must be perceived as a gift and not as a curse. Get to learn from it, savor every minute of it and become that one whole piece of gold that will be sought after by a lot of people. Not because of your glitter but because of your soul and who you really are as a person. This is the time of your life when you will be in connection with your inner self and not all people were given this chance of a lifetime.

Ramblings of a People-Pleaser

“Libra’s are kind but some people construed it as their weakness”

Is being kind considered a weakness?
That is the question I keep asking myself. They’d say, fake it ’till you make it. But no matter how I feign sarcasm and rudeness just to conceal my total kindness; somehow, it has been a total fail. I can appear snob or indifferent for the first few hours you’d know me but after that “getting to know you” stage, I’d be all smiles and that natural kindness would come out.

Sometimes, I also hate myself from being too nice. Most of the time, I’d consider other people’s feelings more than mine. This kindness will eventually become a weakness if I’d meet a person who wouldn’t consider my feelings because I have allowed them to take mine (feelings) for granted. So far, I had been lucky enough to finally identify those people and when I do, all I have to do is make a detour and snob them as much as I can ( I just don’t want it to be so obvious so as not yo hurt their feelings; see, I still have the knack to think about how’d they’d feel even though I know, they really don’t care about mine.) They’d say, I am a people-pleaser whereas, I know in my heart I just don’t want chaos and I never want anybody to feel bad because of me.

 Sometimes, I think I have high EQ (Emotional Quotient) or I am just too naive and gullible at times.

I don’t get mad easily but when I do, it’ll stay for weeks, months and years. I had a hard time moving on and I keep grudges. That’s why I don’t want to get mad at anybody. For me, it’s like a glass – once broken, it’ll never be the same like before. Not that I don’t forgive, because I do, but I never forget. And that’s the real reason why I don’t want to hurt anybody’s feeling. I don’t want a mark in my forehead that says, “She hurt me before, and she might hurt me again.”

Being a people-please has its own perils too. Like delivering bad news. I am never good at playing the bad cop. Being the optimist also has a bad side. Sometimes, I am inside my personal bubble where it’s always sunny and no rainy days. It’s the stars that I see in every darkness and it’s always the half full one. But sometimes, I would also ask, does that mean I am not facing reality?

Is it really a sin to become a people-pleaser when all you want is peace from all sides and angles of the situation? Is it really hard to maintain balance in this world?

At the end of the day, this is the best me I want to be become.

Be Strong, but not rude.
Be kind, but not weak.
Be bold, but not bully.
Be humble, but not shy.
Be confident, but not arrogant.

I want to meet her soon.