How many times have we heard this phrase, “happiness is a choice.” in every self-help books we read and every inspirational Youtube video you watch online. But how do you really choose happiness? And when do you NOT choose happiness?
You know you aren’t choosing happiness if you succumb to depression. If you say you don’t have enough, if you compare your life to others and you aren’t satisfied with what you have.
You know you are not choosing happiness if all you do is complain about how your life is going – you have no job, your work environment is not healthy, you don’t have enough money, your sister is much prettier, your brother achieved more than you do, your best friend has a new car and you describe your life as miserable.
You know you are not choosing happiness if you feel like you have not followed what you really want to do in your life.
You know you are not choosing happiness if you are single and you loathe yourself thinking you don’t deserve to be loved.
Happiness is a choice but how do you choose happiness given these circumstances that you have right now?
Before going to our “how” we must know the “why” first and this is what you should always think about if you started to feel unhappy.
So, first and foremost, answer this question, “Why do you want to be happy?”
My answer to that question is, “Who doesn’t?”
You may think you were choosing happiness but unfortunately, happiness does not want to be with you.
Well, try to look at yourself in another perspective and answer this question.
“Are you happy?”
If you have any hesitations while answering it, you are definitely not choosing happiness. For sure, you succumb yourself to your problems – at home, in school, at work, with your friends, with money matters, relationship and other aspect of your life.
So ask your self again, “Are you happy?” And reiterate that “Happiness is a choice.”
But, how do we choose happiness?
1. Smile… 🙂 though your heart is aching
Our body movements may indirectly affect our mood. It’s one of the tricks I have tried and tested several times and will always work. Smile in the midst of a problem and you’ll find your moral uplifted in an instant. Cry once in a while but when you are out, give your smile to the world.
2. Talk to Yourself
Of course, not in public. You don’t want your office mates/ friends to freak out.
Every morning, when you get up, talk to yourself and motivate yourself that this will be a great day. By the end of the day, let go of the things you have no control over with.
Always see the bright side of every dark situation. As what they say, fake it ’till you make it – yes, it’s applicable to happiness too.
Treat every problem as an opportunity to shine.
3. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
This is one of the happiness killers in the world – envy and greed. You don’t need validation from anybody. They may have the things that you don’t have but they may also not have the things that you have. What they post online is not their true self. It’s the best that they can offer the world. Everybody has problems and no one is spared of any inconvenience and misfortunes. You are just not aware of it.
Our world comprises of endless problems yet, we need not to dwell on all of it. Stick with your guns and instead of complaining about how your life is going, start finding ways to solve it – one problem at a time.
4. Find Yourself
Know what you want and the desires of your heart. Focus on it. This may sound cliche but surely, it will work – soul searching. Go somewhere, enjoy your own company. Know what your deepest insecurities are and start accepting every single one of it. Nobody will love you like the way you love yourself.
5. Be Grateful
No matter how scarce your resources are, be thankful for it. Be grateful that you were given the chance to see the beauty of the world. Train yourself to celebrate the ordinary things because the extra ordinary things can take care of itself.
Smile, get up, dress up and look for something to be thankful for. This will surely make you choose your own happiness. Tell me other ways of choosing happiness. 🙂 Happy Sunday all!