First Day High

Yes, I have said that phrase again; not because I’ve “reset” but because of a new role that was given to me: Line Trainer.
It’s surreal.
I don’t usually accept promotions before even though I know I was qualified. One reason why was “inferiority complex”. I’ve always thought someone else is/are much better than me and they deserve it more than I do.
Fear is another thing. I was so scared to make mistakes. I thought you have to be perfect, exemplary intelligent and is very charming; which means, I thought, you ought to be extra ordinarily beautiful and is very pleasing to the eyes of the other people. I also feared responsibility before, thinking I was never good enough to handle big opportunities.
But, right now, I am slashing them off my list and left with only one trait necessary: Courage.
I was (and still) a happy-go-lucky girl but this time, in a non-conventional way. I have slashed off over thinking and paranoia as well. I started prioritizing things and I’m now ready to accept challenges and to experience the best of both worlds: Heaven and Hell.
I told myself, “I don’t want to chicken out this time.” I have had wasted a few years already and I will never allow myself to put this year to waste again.
The day after my first day with this role, has left me pondering on a lot of stuff and I had a handful realizations that is just starting to hit me. This role is not a joke. Not that I ever thought it was, but it was harder than I thought.
The “teaching” part is just the 25% of the whole package.
Natural Iceberg with Polar Bear
Just like that iceberg, the visible part was not even half of the whole story. The questions that remain though: Am I ready for it? Am I never gonna quit just like the others?
And  I know, right deep inside my heart, I have an honest answer.
EVERYONE has days when feel like giving up. When you have one of those days remember WHY you STARTED! Every STEP you take is a step towards YOUR goal. Yesterday is gone- don't waste time thinking about it. Instead ask yourself what you can do differently today that will help you obtain your goals. Now go out there and be AWESOME!
This is just the first day high. But, I know I am unstoppable and I’d still stick to “that” reason behind.
PS: “that” means
 to become the best version
 of myself.